Independence Day

Tomorrow is July 4th. Happy birthday, USA. Thanks for all the good stuff. I could do without GWB at this point, though.

How I wish I could be independent of my body issues. The other day training partner Scoop sat me down and tried to metaphorically slap me in the face about my craziness. She knows: we have done lots and lots of runs together, the subject of many of which has been my weight or state of physical fitness. I had to explain to her that, while I truly and honestly appreciate her caring, honesty and bravery for talking to me about this, every shrink I've had since age 16 has diagnosed me with an EDNOS, or eating disorder not otherwise specified. That means I don't meet all the criteria for anything in particular but show plenty of the symptoms. I am pathological. It's not that easy to just say, oh, you're right. I'm better now. I wish it were.

So in the meantime, me and my double chin are in Breckenridge, working on the dissertation and drinking lots of wine. Oh, my family is here too. We love it up here on Independence day. Cooler weather, dinky hometown parade and not-too-bad fireworks. I'm excited to do a 10k trail run tomorrow morning in which I have absolutely nothing invested. Learn a new trail, get some exercise, get a T shirt and a coupon for a free beer at the Breckenridge Brewery. Do run. Get free beer. Drink more wine. Eat food that has been cooked on a grill. Watch fireworks. Try to accept myself as I am and realize that I not only am so much more than my physical being, but that most people think I look just fine.