Today I am 42 years old.
To celebrate, I will go to 6:30 am yoga, take my kids to swim lessons, meet with my statistician for more Finding Om number crunching, return a dented $70 garbage can and take the kids back to school shopping (they go back to school August 14th!! Crazy!!). We may go back to the pool if it isn't raining, and then we will go out to dinner. Thai or Japanese. Haven't decided yet.
Oh yeah. And I'll read my horoscope.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Saturday, July 26, 2008
I don't suck!!!
Ran the 10k this morning in 50:40 (clock time-- don't know what my chip time is but probably roughly the same). That translates to 8:09/mile. Wow!! I am totally psyched about that. I was just hoping to do around 9 mins/mile!
This particular 10k is a point to point course, so before I went to the starting line I locked my bike up at the finish line so I could ride it back to the car. Fun, and felt good. For a total bonus there was a farmer's market just up the road from the car, and I had $20 to burn. I'm such a sucker for farmer's markets. I have more fruit at home than I know what to do with. Well, eat it of course, but I hope we can get through it before it goes bad. There's always cobbler, I guess.
Speaking of which, when I went to Baptiste Teacher Training Bootcamp the cooks there made the most incredible raw food desserts and one was blueberry cobbler. Haven't been able to find a recipe for that since. Any ideas?
This particular 10k is a point to point course, so before I went to the starting line I locked my bike up at the finish line so I could ride it back to the car. Fun, and felt good. For a total bonus there was a farmer's market just up the road from the car, and I had $20 to burn. I'm such a sucker for farmer's markets. I have more fruit at home than I know what to do with. Well, eat it of course, but I hope we can get through it before it goes bad. There's always cobbler, I guess.
Speaking of which, when I went to Baptiste Teacher Training Bootcamp the cooks there made the most incredible raw food desserts and one was blueberry cobbler. Haven't been able to find a recipe for that since. Any ideas?
Friday, July 25, 2008
Forearm Balance and a 10K
Last night I went to my new favorite Dharma Mittra style yoga class taught by a great guy whom Dharma himself renamed Sadhu Om (but we don't have to call him that). When I mentioned that in India Sadhus are supposedly holy men but look a lot like naked crazy homeless people the Colorado Sadhu seemed pretty unconcerned. Anyway...
Last night in class was this nice but show-offy yoga guy who definitely brings a spirit of competition into the room. Or maybe it's just me trying to do all the asanas as well as he does. They say if you ride your bicycle with other people you become a better cyclist because you push yourself harder. Does that apply in yoga? In any case, I did some BEAUTIFUL forearm balances. Even Mr. I'm So Great commented on them. Fine, fine, I'm talking ego. Let those who live in glass houses throw the first stone-- by which I mean, oh please, tell me that you have no ego at all involved in your practice. I do try to keep it out but... there it always comes back again. While I'm bragging, I did a pretty nice bird of paradise on one side, too. Those are really hard for me because I don't have the openness in my chest, shoulders or hamstrings.
On that note, I am running a 10k tomorrow morning. It's not a hard race for a change, which will be a welcome relief. I am going to try and push myself to go fast, but we'll see how that goes. All of my mental energy is going toward getting my dissertation done and ready for defense on Sept 12th and I don't really have any give-a-shitness left over for my running times. It is kind of liberating.
Last night in class was this nice but show-offy yoga guy who definitely brings a spirit of competition into the room. Or maybe it's just me trying to do all the asanas as well as he does. They say if you ride your bicycle with other people you become a better cyclist because you push yourself harder. Does that apply in yoga? In any case, I did some BEAUTIFUL forearm balances. Even Mr. I'm So Great commented on them. Fine, fine, I'm talking ego. Let those who live in glass houses throw the first stone-- by which I mean, oh please, tell me that you have no ego at all involved in your practice. I do try to keep it out but... there it always comes back again. While I'm bragging, I did a pretty nice bird of paradise on one side, too. Those are really hard for me because I don't have the openness in my chest, shoulders or hamstrings.
On that note, I am running a 10k tomorrow morning. It's not a hard race for a change, which will be a welcome relief. I am going to try and push myself to go fast, but we'll see how that goes. All of my mental energy is going toward getting my dissertation done and ready for defense on Sept 12th and I don't really have any give-a-shitness left over for my running times. It is kind of liberating.
Friday, July 18, 2008
Finding Om worked!!!!!!
Met with my statistician today, who also happens to be the interim president of the fine school from which I am obtaining my PsyD. Guess what?
MY RESULTS ARE STATISTICALLY SIGNIFICANT!!!!!!!
From my dissertation draft (all rights reserved or Yoga Chickie will come after your asana):
"The main finding using a pre and post paired sample t test was that at the end of the 10 weeks of Finding Om the mean number of objective binge episodes had dropped from 4.75 (SD = 2.34) as reported pre-intervention to 1.95 (SD = 2.18) binges per week, with 2 participants reporting having eliminated binges completely (range 0-7, median = 1.5). This difference is significant (t = 5.78, df = 9, p < .001).
These results stayed stable and in fact improved at an 8 week informal follow up. Eighty percent of participants responded to an email query asking how many times they were bingeing and practicing yoga per week. At 8 weeks post-intervention, binge rate had fallen to a mean of 1.2 per week (range = 0-5, median = 0.4). A one-way repeated measures ANOVA found a significant difference in the number of objective binge incidents pre intervention, post intervention and at 8-week follow up (F (1,7) = 13.96, p = .007)."
What does that mean? That there is a one in 1,000 probability that I could have obtained these results based on chance alone for the pre to post intervention figures, and a 7/1000 probability that I could have gotten them on chance alone for the followup figures.
It worked. Yahoo. Despite the fact that my statistician is also the acting president, around whom one might want to show some level of decorum, I did a happy dance all around his office.
Yay. Hooray. I did it. They did it. We did it.
MY RESULTS ARE STATISTICALLY SIGNIFICANT!!!!!!!
From my dissertation draft (all rights reserved or Yoga Chickie will come after your asana):
"The main finding using a pre and post paired sample t test was that at the end of the 10 weeks of Finding Om the mean number of objective binge episodes had dropped from 4.75 (SD = 2.34) as reported pre-intervention to 1.95 (SD = 2.18) binges per week, with 2 participants reporting having eliminated binges completely (range 0-7, median = 1.5). This difference is significant (t = 5.78, df = 9, p < .001).
These results stayed stable and in fact improved at an 8 week informal follow up. Eighty percent of participants responded to an email query asking how many times they were bingeing and practicing yoga per week. At 8 weeks post-intervention, binge rate had fallen to a mean of 1.2 per week (range = 0-5, median = 0.4). A one-way repeated measures ANOVA found a significant difference in the number of objective binge incidents pre intervention, post intervention and at 8-week follow up (F (1,7) = 13.96, p = .007)."
What does that mean? That there is a one in 1,000 probability that I could have obtained these results based on chance alone for the pre to post intervention figures, and a 7/1000 probability that I could have gotten them on chance alone for the followup figures.
It worked. Yahoo. Despite the fact that my statistician is also the acting president, around whom one might want to show some level of decorum, I did a happy dance all around his office.
Yay. Hooray. I did it. They did it. We did it.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Camp Nurse
I posted a topic for the post I must have been planning to write but got distracted and never wrote it. So here it is with a new title.
Genogirl went to sleepover camp last Sunday, and will stay there until Sunday July 27th. During that time she will be getting her shots from the camp nurse. Of all the things about camp, this was the one that was making her the most nervous. Her fear that she would be the only kid on meds was assuaged when she saw the length of the meds line at camp dropoff. And when I said that she is on Genotropin, the nurse said "oh, someone else is on this, too." Normalization is a good thing.
I wonder how it is going for her. Not too traumatically, I supposed, because I haven't heard from her about it yet.
Genogirl went to sleepover camp last Sunday, and will stay there until Sunday July 27th. During that time she will be getting her shots from the camp nurse. Of all the things about camp, this was the one that was making her the most nervous. Her fear that she would be the only kid on meds was assuaged when she saw the length of the meds line at camp dropoff. And when I said that she is on Genotropin, the nurse said "oh, someone else is on this, too." Normalization is a good thing.
I wonder how it is going for her. Not too traumatically, I supposed, because I haven't heard from her about it yet.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
I touch myself
I finally broke down and got a mammogram. This should have been my third but instead it was my first.
Less unpleasant than I had feared, but certainly not enjoyable. Especially because she had to redo the right one twice. Good thing for yoga breathing, because that definitely kept the whole situation a lot more under control.
Now my breasts feel... manhandled, dare I say, but not in a good way.
I keep touching them because I feel like I need to coax them back into place or comfort them or something. The problem is I keep doing it in public. I must look like some sort of pervert. This might be a good time to practice mindfulness.
Less unpleasant than I had feared, but certainly not enjoyable. Especially because she had to redo the right one twice. Good thing for yoga breathing, because that definitely kept the whole situation a lot more under control.
Now my breasts feel... manhandled, dare I say, but not in a good way.
I keep touching them because I feel like I need to coax them back into place or comfort them or something. The problem is I keep doing it in public. I must look like some sort of pervert. This might be a good time to practice mindfulness.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Beauty all around me
I went for a bike ride in the stunning Garden of the Gods this morning. Always hard, always beautiful. I was very cognizant of how lucky I am to live in such a gorgeous place.
I thought of my mother-in-law (blessed be her memory), who lived a very provincial life, despite spending most of her life an hour from Philly and a short stint in Chicago. Her 2001 visit to us here in Colorado Springs was the only trip she had ever taken out west, and she spent much of the time declaring, in an almost angry voice, "I hope people who live here appreciate this place." I assured her that, although not a native, I certainly appreciate it.
I still do. Very much so.
I thought of my mother-in-law (blessed be her memory), who lived a very provincial life, despite spending most of her life an hour from Philly and a short stint in Chicago. Her 2001 visit to us here in Colorado Springs was the only trip she had ever taken out west, and she spent much of the time declaring, in an almost angry voice, "I hope people who live here appreciate this place." I assured her that, although not a native, I certainly appreciate it.
I still do. Very much so.
Monday, July 14, 2008
All Quiet on the Home Front
Elder daughter is away at summer camp. Husband is away for work. That leaves me and the younger one. Kind of nice. Kind of lonely. Lots less fighting.
What is a little too quiet for my liking is my dissertation. I need to crunch my numbers on SPSS (statistical packaging for the social sciences), a computer program which is very expensive but my school has available for our use.
Finding Om had 10 subjects. I have data entered in for 9. Finally got the paperwork back from #10, and now SPSS is down. There is only so much I can do to move forward without my actual data. I mean, based on 9 people I know the general trend (less binges-- yay!) but I can't move ahead in the writing too much more than what I've already done. And with a Sept 12th defense date, the clock is ticking.
I've been assured it will be up and running early this week. Monday is over. We'll see how this goes.
What is a little too quiet for my liking is my dissertation. I need to crunch my numbers on SPSS (statistical packaging for the social sciences), a computer program which is very expensive but my school has available for our use.
Finding Om had 10 subjects. I have data entered in for 9. Finally got the paperwork back from #10, and now SPSS is down. There is only so much I can do to move forward without my actual data. I mean, based on 9 people I know the general trend (less binges-- yay!) but I can't move ahead in the writing too much more than what I've already done. And with a Sept 12th defense date, the clock is ticking.
I've been assured it will be up and running early this week. Monday is over. We'll see how this goes.
Friday, July 11, 2008
Yoga Renegade
It was 92 degrees here in Colorado Springs yesterday. Not that I'm complaining. I am actually enjoying the hot weather. But it does cause one to drink a lot. Ya get very, very thirsty in this semi-arid climate.
By later afternoon I'd already had a liter of water. And another liter of homemade lemonade sweetened with stevia. Another liter of unsweetented cranberry juice mixed with water and stevia. I wanted something... not juicy. Not water, either. Driving home after picking up my kids I passed a Starbucks. Aha. Iced cofee. So, back home I brewed up a pot and filled my Nalgene bottle once again, this time with coffee mixed with fat free Coffee Mate (I can't help it, I love it), stevia (my go-to sweetener, obviously), a teaspoonful of vanilla protien powder and lots and lots of ice. YUM!
And this is what I brought with me to my evening yoga class. Tee hee. While everyone else was stoically drinking water as we sweat through our asanas, I was loving every sip of my icy icy iced coffee concoction. Sure, sure, I missed out on some of yoga's detoxifying benefits. Whatever. It was decaf, anyway.
By later afternoon I'd already had a liter of water. And another liter of homemade lemonade sweetened with stevia. Another liter of unsweetented cranberry juice mixed with water and stevia. I wanted something... not juicy. Not water, either. Driving home after picking up my kids I passed a Starbucks. Aha. Iced cofee. So, back home I brewed up a pot and filled my Nalgene bottle once again, this time with coffee mixed with fat free Coffee Mate (I can't help it, I love it), stevia (my go-to sweetener, obviously), a teaspoonful of vanilla protien powder and lots and lots of ice. YUM!
And this is what I brought with me to my evening yoga class. Tee hee. While everyone else was stoically drinking water as we sweat through our asanas, I was loving every sip of my icy icy iced coffee concoction. Sure, sure, I missed out on some of yoga's detoxifying benefits. Whatever. It was decaf, anyway.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Redemption is mine
The official results of the Breckenridge Firecracker 10K are in. I placed 6th out of 30 in my age group!!! Yahoo!!! I feel great.
I didn't realize how much it bothered me to place in the bottom 1/4 at the Mt. Evans Ascent. Yes, it was a hardcore race. Yes, over 125 registered entrants stayed home, presumably leaving only the hardiest racers. Yes, I am generally a mid pack runner and am comfortable with that. But there's the rub. I didn't realize quite how comfortable. As in, I know I'm not going to win, but I like it that a whole lot of people finish behind me.
Well, there you have it. I guess yoga hasn't completely eradicated my ego about ridiculous things. Oh well. La la la. I came in 6th (to be sung accompanied by happy dance).
Now if I could only find my will power and stop eating so much, because the happy dance ends when it comes to feeling good about myself in that category.
I didn't realize how much it bothered me to place in the bottom 1/4 at the Mt. Evans Ascent. Yes, it was a hardcore race. Yes, over 125 registered entrants stayed home, presumably leaving only the hardiest racers. Yes, I am generally a mid pack runner and am comfortable with that. But there's the rub. I didn't realize quite how comfortable. As in, I know I'm not going to win, but I like it that a whole lot of people finish behind me.
Well, there you have it. I guess yoga hasn't completely eradicated my ego about ridiculous things. Oh well. La la la. I came in 6th (to be sung accompanied by happy dance).
Now if I could only find my will power and stop eating so much, because the happy dance ends when it comes to feeling good about myself in that category.
Friday, July 4, 2008
This aint no garden variety July 4th 10k
Every town in America has some kind of July 4th citizens race, and Breckenridge CO is no exception. Actually, it has been an exception until this year, contenting itself with the hardcore Firecracker 50 mile mountain bike race, which also doubles as the national mountain bike championships. Happily for me, this year inaugurated the Firecracker 10k, which I gleefully paid my $20 to enter.
Unhappily for me, the first 3 miles climbed roughly 1,000 feet, from 9,600 feet elevation to 10,400 feet. Why, oh why can't I enter any non-killer races?
That said, I redeemed myself, at least in my own eyes. Mount Evans was killer, and finishing in the bottom 1/4 of runners was kind of hard on my ego. Today I finished 6th out of 30 in my age group. I admit it. It felt good. I am so signing up for this race next year. Even as I was running I was coming up with places in Colorado Springs where I can do some apples to apples training runs, although at a somewhat lower altitude.
Now, after having eaten much of the candy my kids scored at the Main St. Parade, I have to go get good and drunk in time for the fireworks.
Unhappily for me, the first 3 miles climbed roughly 1,000 feet, from 9,600 feet elevation to 10,400 feet. Why, oh why can't I enter any non-killer races?
That said, I redeemed myself, at least in my own eyes. Mount Evans was killer, and finishing in the bottom 1/4 of runners was kind of hard on my ego. Today I finished 6th out of 30 in my age group. I admit it. It felt good. I am so signing up for this race next year. Even as I was running I was coming up with places in Colorado Springs where I can do some apples to apples training runs, although at a somewhat lower altitude.
Now, after having eaten much of the candy my kids scored at the Main St. Parade, I have to go get good and drunk in time for the fireworks.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Independence Day
Tomorrow is July 4th. Happy birthday, USA. Thanks for all the good stuff. I could do without GWB at this point, though.
How I wish I could be independent of my body issues. The other day training partner Scoop sat me down and tried to metaphorically slap me in the face about my craziness. She knows: we have done lots and lots of runs together, the subject of many of which has been my weight or state of physical fitness. I had to explain to her that, while I truly and honestly appreciate her caring, honesty and bravery for talking to me about this, every shrink I've had since age 16 has diagnosed me with an EDNOS, or eating disorder not otherwise specified. That means I don't meet all the criteria for anything in particular but show plenty of the symptoms. I am pathological. It's not that easy to just say, oh, you're right. I'm better now. I wish it were.
So in the meantime, me and my double chin are in Breckenridge, working on the dissertation and drinking lots of wine. Oh, my family is here too. We love it up here on Independence day. Cooler weather, dinky hometown parade and not-too-bad fireworks. I'm excited to do a 10k trail run tomorrow morning in which I have absolutely nothing invested. Learn a new trail, get some exercise, get a T shirt and a coupon for a free beer at the Breckenridge Brewery. Do run. Get free beer. Drink more wine. Eat food that has been cooked on a grill. Watch fireworks. Try to accept myself as I am and realize that I not only am so much more than my physical being, but that most people think I look just fine.
How I wish I could be independent of my body issues. The other day training partner Scoop sat me down and tried to metaphorically slap me in the face about my craziness. She knows: we have done lots and lots of runs together, the subject of many of which has been my weight or state of physical fitness. I had to explain to her that, while I truly and honestly appreciate her caring, honesty and bravery for talking to me about this, every shrink I've had since age 16 has diagnosed me with an EDNOS, or eating disorder not otherwise specified. That means I don't meet all the criteria for anything in particular but show plenty of the symptoms. I am pathological. It's not that easy to just say, oh, you're right. I'm better now. I wish it were.
So in the meantime, me and my double chin are in Breckenridge, working on the dissertation and drinking lots of wine. Oh, my family is here too. We love it up here on Independence day. Cooler weather, dinky hometown parade and not-too-bad fireworks. I'm excited to do a 10k trail run tomorrow morning in which I have absolutely nothing invested. Learn a new trail, get some exercise, get a T shirt and a coupon for a free beer at the Breckenridge Brewery. Do run. Get free beer. Drink more wine. Eat food that has been cooked on a grill. Watch fireworks. Try to accept myself as I am and realize that I not only am so much more than my physical being, but that most people think I look just fine.
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